This is why I became a vegetarian, MWAHAHHAHAHA. I want those tiny vegetables to suffer more! It is, by the way, now 6 months since I decided to convert. I think I should get a badge or something, like a swimming badge or one of those AA coins.
The funny thing is that the night before I found this, I asked AMA:
“Scenario: Someone put a curse on you and you will in 5 minutes be transformed into a vegetable in someone’s kitchen, but you will have all your ordinary cognitive and sensory functions intact. You get to choose which vegetable to transform into. What do you choose and why?
I think it would be worst to be a potato, since people usually peel their skin off and then boil them, and if you’re really unlucky after you’ve been boiled they might make mashed potatoes out of you. I would therefore choose a vegetable that decayed quickly, so they either ate me or threw me away relatively fast. I don’t think a cucumber would be a good idea since they’re rather big and most people usually amputate them piece by piece over a span of several days. Because of this I would probably choose to be turned into a radish, plus a lot of people dislike them and aren’t going to eat them.”
The answers had 4 different trends:
One group picked a vegetable that was less likely to be eaten or prepared in painful ways: The most popular answer was brussel sprouts since most people would just throw them away.
Another group picked a vegetable after it’s ability to exert revenge on it’s reaper. One poster wanted to be a vegetable contaminated with Ecoli, another wanted to be a really potent onion that would sting the eyes of it’s perpetrator.
A third group of people picked vegetables after their likeliness to end up inside a woman’s vagina. Cucumbers and carrots were the only vegetables present in these answers.
The forth group of answers were replies to the posters in group 1 about how they would suffer in numerous ways if they ever ended up in their kitchen. Group 4 didn’t have a common vegetable, but several agreed that they would eat all the brussel sprouts in group 1.
… in other words, I’m not the only one who spends time thinking about these kinds of things.